There's an overwhelming sense of angst in the air today and it seems to be coming from the debilitating shadow cast by that evil nemesis, the Great Unknown.
I spent a good part of the morning diving into what it is that I don't know to see what I could learn from it and here's what I found:
1) What I don't know is WAY more than what I do know. Not only does this mean that I have alot more to learn, it also and possibly even more importantly means that I can't possibly know everything or even most of everything. This is somehow freeing in that I'm able to give myself permission to not know. Hey! I get to not know! I don't have to have all the answers. phew.
2) Since what I don't know is WAY more than what I do know, it requires a ton of room to exist within. This means that I can't possibly hold the space within myself for all there is that I don't already know. It's no wonder that I'm feeling yucky and over-taxed. I've been trying to contain all this unknown somehow! Who do I think I am? Hercules?
3) Realizing that I'd been trying to contain way more than what was mine to contain, I called upon a few members of my support team: meditation, a good cry, and talking it out. I'm now feeling at least a bit more present and have purged a good portion of the angst.
4) Now exhausted, yet softened and more pliant, I can feel the hold of the Great Unknown loosen its grip as I, too, loosen mine. I'm reminded to let go of any attachment I have to the outcomes that I hope for and to simply trust that I am doing what I can, showing up to be with what is, and responding just as I do, without worrying that I have to get it exactly right. A wise woman I know said this recently and it's really resonating with me right now: "When I let go of the control, and respond from a place that is grounded, detached, and confidently secure (it doesn't matter what happens - both outcomes are good ones), I get the response that I'm hoping for and then some."
...and so, feeling very relieved that I don't have to know everything and I don't have to carry the weight of the entirety of the unknown either, I'm feeling a sense of safety and spaciousness around me. I'm grateful for the support of others and my courage to sit with the unknown.
What about you? Are you ready to dive in to the Great Unknown to see what you can learn? Do it. You'll feel better in the long run, I promise. I'd love to hear how it goes!
Tuesday, March 8, 2011
Thursday, March 3, 2011
I'm Here to Make a Really Big Difference!
You know that feeling that you have when you get to experience a profoundly deep shift in consciousness after a retreat, training or getting out there and affecting change? That feeling when you're bigger than yourself, like you've combined energies with the others who have experienced this event with you and that you're now forever connected? That sense of feeling like everything's brighter and nothing can stop you? That deep knowing that you're here to make a really big difference and you know just what it is that you are here to do? I know you know what I'm talking about!
I'm inspired to do this by the fine example of FOUR YEARS. GO., by my work and training as a coach and long-time involvement and interest in serving the greater good. ...and by the heart-bursting reality that the compounded effects of each of our efforts is beyond amazing!
So, come on! Let's declare right here and now that we're here to make a really big difference! In the spirit of building community and getting to know a bit more about what each of us are doing to make this world a better place, share a bit of your ultimate wish for the world and what you're doing today to make that wish come true by commenting below.
I'm inspired to do this by the fine example of FOUR YEARS. GO., by my work and training as a coach and long-time involvement and interest in serving the greater good. ...and by the heart-bursting reality that the compounded effects of each of our efforts is beyond amazing!
So, come on! Let's declare right here and now that we're here to make a really big difference! In the spirit of building community and getting to know a bit more about what each of us are doing to make this world a better place, share a bit of your ultimate wish for the world and what you're doing today to make that wish come true by commenting below.
Monday, February 28, 2011
Happy Monday!
Quick! Name three things you're happy about right now.
Ugh. It's Monday and it's a pretty typical one, which can mean that it might be just a little difficult to tap into that happy place. It's times like these that I revive myself with this little technique. You see, there once was a time that I would fall into deep inconsolable depression and despair practically every Sunday evening, just before bedtime. I knew that Monday was just around the corner, which meant the beginning of another week of working in a world that didn't understand me, being with friends who didn't support me (not really), and living a life that didn't feel like it fit me at all. Thank God I'm past that painful phase! I've learned so much since then. Yet occasionally, when something big in my life shifts or I become overly exhausted, those feelings of desperate isolation and deep sadness burrow their parasitic little heads into my skin to feed. This immediately brings me back to the bleakness of those Sundays, which I thank for the depth of their lesson. Next I acknowledge my ability to be resilient and open to possibility, then shift my attention toward the present moment. Here's where I ask myself to play along for just a few minutes. Ready? Okay...
Close your eyes and breathe slowly, inhaling deeply into your belly. Allow your exhales to soften your shoulders, your neck. Feel the surface of the chair that's beneath you -- feel it holding you. Sense the floor beneath the chair, uncross your legs and plant your feet solidly there. Breathe. Now allow yourself to scan your internal landscape. Notice how you feel in your body as you move your attention to your different parts. Breathe. Just notice. Take another deep breath.
Quick! Name three things you're happy about right now. Ah! Okay, I think I can do this...
I'm happy about my home. I love that I've managed to make this place pretty much just the way I want it. I'm comfortable here and it really feels just right. Ah...
I'm happy about my personal freedom. Wow! This is a big one. So often I see and hear people complaining and feeling victimized by their circumstances. I'm so affected by this that it feeds my own ability to choose to remain in a state of personal growth. This ability to choose is the personal freedom that I'm talking about here. Good stuff.
Petra, my younger dog. She's my daily reminder that there's boundless possibility for adventure, joyful excitement and soul-feeding surprises in each new day.
So, how about you? What 3 things are making you happy right now?
Ugh. It's Monday and it's a pretty typical one, which can mean that it might be just a little difficult to tap into that happy place. It's times like these that I revive myself with this little technique. You see, there once was a time that I would fall into deep inconsolable depression and despair practically every Sunday evening, just before bedtime. I knew that Monday was just around the corner, which meant the beginning of another week of working in a world that didn't understand me, being with friends who didn't support me (not really), and living a life that didn't feel like it fit me at all. Thank God I'm past that painful phase! I've learned so much since then. Yet occasionally, when something big in my life shifts or I become overly exhausted, those feelings of desperate isolation and deep sadness burrow their parasitic little heads into my skin to feed. This immediately brings me back to the bleakness of those Sundays, which I thank for the depth of their lesson. Next I acknowledge my ability to be resilient and open to possibility, then shift my attention toward the present moment. Here's where I ask myself to play along for just a few minutes. Ready? Okay...
Close your eyes and breathe slowly, inhaling deeply into your belly. Allow your exhales to soften your shoulders, your neck. Feel the surface of the chair that's beneath you -- feel it holding you. Sense the floor beneath the chair, uncross your legs and plant your feet solidly there. Breathe. Now allow yourself to scan your internal landscape. Notice how you feel in your body as you move your attention to your different parts. Breathe. Just notice. Take another deep breath.
Quick! Name three things you're happy about right now. Ah! Okay, I think I can do this...
I'm happy about my home. I love that I've managed to make this place pretty much just the way I want it. I'm comfortable here and it really feels just right. Ah...
I'm happy about my personal freedom. Wow! This is a big one. So often I see and hear people complaining and feeling victimized by their circumstances. I'm so affected by this that it feeds my own ability to choose to remain in a state of personal growth. This ability to choose is the personal freedom that I'm talking about here. Good stuff.
Petra, my younger dog. She's my daily reminder that there's boundless possibility for adventure, joyful excitement and soul-feeding surprises in each new day.
So, how about you? What 3 things are making you happy right now?
Tuesday, February 8, 2011
It's what I do!
So, I've been spending ALOT of time lately working to come up with ordinary words to describe just what it is that I do and just how it is that I am. This is really important stuff! I mean, I'm "coming out" as a coach who provides a really amazing service. ...the service of helping people to find ease while they're busily working to save the world! It's no small feat, this business of saving the world. It can be so overwhelming and full of uncertainty and struggle. Yet, this is the work that my clients simply MUST do -- they are taking responsibility for an actual portion of the change that's happening right now -- they are being the change they wish to see in the world. ...and I grant them ease.
Yes, it's kind of magical and pragmatic all at once, this service that I provide. Granting ease. So how do I say that this is what I do? How do I describe myself in simple terms that bodes well with both the magical powers I possess that allow me to actually bestow this quality on others and my matter-of-fact, no bullshit style that doesn't tolerate alot of intangible blither.
One thing that I'm going to do is play with metaphor a bit to see what comes. There's this awesome teacher and inspirer named Havi Brooks that I've recently learned about who specializes in what she calls destuckification. Her blog post I am metaphor mouse! Zapping the Tickler. provides a wonderful example that will allow me to brainstorm from both sides of my brain. Yippee! What fun! I can already feel it going in alot of directions all at once (there goes my own saving-the-world nature considering the sheer magnitude of the ripple effect of our collective efforts) and see myself working to stay focused on developing the metaphor at hand while simultaneously honoring emerging metaphors as they materialize.
My situation:
I want you to understand just what it is that I do. Even more, I want to give myself a title that says something about who I am that serves what what I do. I want to be able to say it in a way that doesn't sound woo-woo or esoteric, yet imparts a feeling of magic. I want it to be in ordinary language (says the matter-of-fact, no bullshit me) that anyone with a college education and at least 27 years of life experience can understand, yet despite its ordinary-ness, it will evoke sheer relief and a sense of wanting to hear lots more in a good number of them. Oh, and I want to boil it down to two words or less.
I'm going to spend the next day or so donning the cape and mask of Metaphor Mouse (read with a big announcer voice and echo effect with Black Sabbath playing in the background) and look forward to seeing what is unleashed! (did I mention that there's also a certain wildness to the quality of who I am?) If you're like me and feeling stuck on a word or words that just aren't fitting the use you have in mind for them, I'd love it if you'd join me in the adventure. See you on the other side!
Yes, it's kind of magical and pragmatic all at once, this service that I provide. Granting ease. So how do I say that this is what I do? How do I describe myself in simple terms that bodes well with both the magical powers I possess that allow me to actually bestow this quality on others and my matter-of-fact, no bullshit style that doesn't tolerate alot of intangible blither.
One thing that I'm going to do is play with metaphor a bit to see what comes. There's this awesome teacher and inspirer named Havi Brooks that I've recently learned about who specializes in what she calls destuckification. Her blog post I am metaphor mouse! Zapping the Tickler. provides a wonderful example that will allow me to brainstorm from both sides of my brain. Yippee! What fun! I can already feel it going in alot of directions all at once (there goes my own saving-the-world nature considering the sheer magnitude of the ripple effect of our collective efforts) and see myself working to stay focused on developing the metaphor at hand while simultaneously honoring emerging metaphors as they materialize.
My situation:
I want you to understand just what it is that I do. Even more, I want to give myself a title that says something about who I am that serves what what I do. I want to be able to say it in a way that doesn't sound woo-woo or esoteric, yet imparts a feeling of magic. I want it to be in ordinary language (says the matter-of-fact, no bullshit me) that anyone with a college education and at least 27 years of life experience can understand, yet despite its ordinary-ness, it will evoke sheer relief and a sense of wanting to hear lots more in a good number of them. Oh, and I want to boil it down to two words or less.
I'm going to spend the next day or so donning the cape and mask of Metaphor Mouse (read with a big announcer voice and echo effect with Black Sabbath playing in the background) and look forward to seeing what is unleashed! (did I mention that there's also a certain wildness to the quality of who I am?) If you're like me and feeling stuck on a word or words that just aren't fitting the use you have in mind for them, I'd love it if you'd join me in the adventure. See you on the other side!
Wednesday, February 2, 2011
Smoke, Seeds and Shadows
A fierce wind blew out the moon late last night and brought in a morning so cloudless that everything was broadly lit by a rich, gorgeously golden sunlight. The crisp robin's egg blue sky provided such a contrast to the edges of the leaves and the hills and the birds and the wires that the word perspective didn't sufficiently describe the depth and aliveness of the scene.
It's midseason and also Groundhog Day, with a blown out moon, to boot, so I conjured up a bit of ceremony to call in spring by honoring its approach, lighting a bonfire and planting a few seeds, both those of intention and the vegetable kind, all under the supervision and guidance of my two dogs, three goats, several ravens and a red shouldered hawk. ...while chirpily serenaded by a chorus of frogs. It really was quite lovely!
Meanwhile, across the continent, Punxsutawney Phil, the prognosticator of prognosticators, has predicted that spring will come early this year, which makes me feel far less guilty for enjoying this beautiful day as I have been knowing that many, many others are suffering subzero temperatures and more snow than they'd like. Spring is on its way!
This day is a good day for grounding activities -- there's been so much expansive, sometimes creative, even destructive energy in the air that it's left many exhausted and overwhelmed, and others a bit confused or disoriented. Take good care, be close to the earth, light a candle (or a bonfire!) and take a good long soak in a beautifully scented, salted bath. The steps that you've taken and the cycles you have set in motion are about to reveal something big! Best that you are ready.
It's midseason and also Groundhog Day, with a blown out moon, to boot, so I conjured up a bit of ceremony to call in spring by honoring its approach, lighting a bonfire and planting a few seeds, both those of intention and the vegetable kind, all under the supervision and guidance of my two dogs, three goats, several ravens and a red shouldered hawk. ...while chirpily serenaded by a chorus of frogs. It really was quite lovely!Meanwhile, across the continent, Punxsutawney Phil, the prognosticator of prognosticators, has predicted that spring will come early this year, which makes me feel far less guilty for enjoying this beautiful day as I have been knowing that many, many others are suffering subzero temperatures and more snow than they'd like. Spring is on its way!
This day is a good day for grounding activities -- there's been so much expansive, sometimes creative, even destructive energy in the air that it's left many exhausted and overwhelmed, and others a bit confused or disoriented. Take good care, be close to the earth, light a candle (or a bonfire!) and take a good long soak in a beautifully scented, salted bath. The steps that you've taken and the cycles you have set in motion are about to reveal something big! Best that you are ready.
Wednesday, January 26, 2011
Information is Key
I had planned to write today's blog post on my experiences while traveling in Cambodia last summer, but the events of my last fifteen hours or so have pointed me in another direction.
While working diligently yesterday afternoon on my homework for the awesome business-building course I'm taking, my elder dog, Kelly, was out back suffering from the sudden onset of what I believe to be Vestibular Disease. My focus was on myself and my work and I hadn't noticed how quiet my dogs were being as I plugged away happily, feeling quite content with my progress. You can imagine my dismay and gut-wrenching sadness when I went to let the girls in and found our dear Kelly seemingly unable to sense the location of the Earth beneath her, a dribble of saliva dangling from her typically dainty muzzle. I stood stricken, at first wanting to blame myself for putting her outside to begin with, then shaking with fear, almost paralyzed at the thought that I, we, might be losing her. I remained immersed in this sense of impending loss, sadness and fear for a few moments as I did a quick scan of the yard. Yes, there it was -- further evidence that she had been suffering for a while -- vomit, times five. Now, about ready to hurl, not at finding the puke, but because the fear and impending loss were twisting my stomach around their fingers. Then, as Kelly stood there, unafraid, yet a bit confused, I knew what to do. Seek more information!
I opened my senses and observed her movements while stroking her fur to soothe her. She melted into my care and took comfort in lying down as I coaxed her into her bed. Next, I called the vet to get a sanity check on what was going on... "Is she having a stroke?" I asked. "Not likely," the doc responded. "It's highly unusual for dogs to have strokes or other vascular episodes. It's tough to know what's going on without seeing her," she offered. "I understand, and thank you, but I feel as if I need to keep her here at home, at least for the evening, so I can be with her and get a better sense of what's going on." The doctor graciously gave me a few more minutes of her time as I shared more of Kelly's symptoms: nausea, drooling, refusing water and food, and a disoriented presence, paddling her legs about as if she were unsure how to use them. She agreed that it wasn't unreasonable for Kelly to stay at home tonight, then she provided me with a clue. "It could be something called Old Dog Vestibular Disease. This is a condition where they become suddenly dizzy, which would be in line with the symptoms that you're describing. You can treat the dizziness with Bonine to see if that helps." Wow! Okay, a new direction. I felt the grip on my stomach loosen a bit as I thanked the doctor, hung up the phone, and took a few deep breaths.
Now, as the details of Kelly's condition are still unfolding, I'll have to ask you to check back with me to see how things progress. Meanwhile, to share a bit more about how all this applies to my bigger story...
I'm beginning to see a pattern. The discovery of my dog in this state led me to open up my senses, look for clues not only in the physical landscape, but within my emotional body. My gut literally convinced me to seek out enough information to get very clear on the right thing to do. Being very present to the situation, to my dog, and to myself helped me to navigate the information that was coming in and to know, really know, what to do next. Without my presence, I could very well have spent the whole night fretting on the uncertainty of Kelly's lifespan, spinning tales of my own ineptitude at caring for my pets, or some other unproductive crazy-making activity. If information is key, perhaps presence is the hand that turns it.
While working diligently yesterday afternoon on my homework for the awesome business-building course I'm taking, my elder dog, Kelly, was out back suffering from the sudden onset of what I believe to be Vestibular Disease. My focus was on myself and my work and I hadn't noticed how quiet my dogs were being as I plugged away happily, feeling quite content with my progress. You can imagine my dismay and gut-wrenching sadness when I went to let the girls in and found our dear Kelly seemingly unable to sense the location of the Earth beneath her, a dribble of saliva dangling from her typically dainty muzzle. I stood stricken, at first wanting to blame myself for putting her outside to begin with, then shaking with fear, almost paralyzed at the thought that I, we, might be losing her. I remained immersed in this sense of impending loss, sadness and fear for a few moments as I did a quick scan of the yard. Yes, there it was -- further evidence that she had been suffering for a while -- vomit, times five. Now, about ready to hurl, not at finding the puke, but because the fear and impending loss were twisting my stomach around their fingers. Then, as Kelly stood there, unafraid, yet a bit confused, I knew what to do. Seek more information!
I opened my senses and observed her movements while stroking her fur to soothe her. She melted into my care and took comfort in lying down as I coaxed her into her bed. Next, I called the vet to get a sanity check on what was going on... "Is she having a stroke?" I asked. "Not likely," the doc responded. "It's highly unusual for dogs to have strokes or other vascular episodes. It's tough to know what's going on without seeing her," she offered. "I understand, and thank you, but I feel as if I need to keep her here at home, at least for the evening, so I can be with her and get a better sense of what's going on." The doctor graciously gave me a few more minutes of her time as I shared more of Kelly's symptoms: nausea, drooling, refusing water and food, and a disoriented presence, paddling her legs about as if she were unsure how to use them. She agreed that it wasn't unreasonable for Kelly to stay at home tonight, then she provided me with a clue. "It could be something called Old Dog Vestibular Disease. This is a condition where they become suddenly dizzy, which would be in line with the symptoms that you're describing. You can treat the dizziness with Bonine to see if that helps." Wow! Okay, a new direction. I felt the grip on my stomach loosen a bit as I thanked the doctor, hung up the phone, and took a few deep breaths.
Now, as the details of Kelly's condition are still unfolding, I'll have to ask you to check back with me to see how things progress. Meanwhile, to share a bit more about how all this applies to my bigger story...
I'm beginning to see a pattern. The discovery of my dog in this state led me to open up my senses, look for clues not only in the physical landscape, but within my emotional body. My gut literally convinced me to seek out enough information to get very clear on the right thing to do. Being very present to the situation, to my dog, and to myself helped me to navigate the information that was coming in and to know, really know, what to do next. Without my presence, I could very well have spent the whole night fretting on the uncertainty of Kelly's lifespan, spinning tales of my own ineptitude at caring for my pets, or some other unproductive crazy-making activity. If information is key, perhaps presence is the hand that turns it.
Thursday, January 6, 2011
5 Steps to Rejuvenate after the Holidays
This first week of the new year has been a whirlwind for me. Coming down from the sugar high and other overindulgences, ramping up for things to get back to some semblance of normal, cleaning out the accumulated clutter of decorations and leftover trimmings, and embarking into the uncharted territories ahead with the support of a new business building program underway... I'm feeling amped up, but admittedly a bit spun out! I'm feeling the need to get grounded and rejuvenated.
I imagine that a little rejuvenation might feel good to you right about now, too.
So... how can I keep this energetically lifted feeling, yet eliminate the overwhelm, you ask? Just follow these five easy steps and you'll be on your way:
STEP 1 -- Allow yourself to dream. What is it that you absolutely love? What feeds your soul? The fresh scent of earth as it's churned beneath your trowel? The vastness and wonder of a starry night sky or a rugged, isolated beach? The ecstatic bliss of being completely surrounded by and filled with music as you close your eyes and your body moves magically to the beat, the rhythm, the melody...
STEP 2 -- Decide. Now, if you weren't having fun already, really let loose here. What one thing would be most amazing to immerse yourself in right now? That's the one!
STEP 3 -- Schedule some YOU time. No have-to, must-do, gotta get done stuff here. And try and carve out time that will be yours alone. How much time depends on you. Two or three hours would be a really good start, but don't knock yourself if you can dedicate only 15 minutes. Seriously, write it on your calendar or your favorite time management tool. Consider scheduling several shorter "YOU times" if one long one feels daunting. [hint: this is a great place to ask for some help -- help caring for the kids, taking care of Mom, preparing that presentation. Now's a great time to cash in on offers of assistance and to delegate.]
STEP 4 -- Get moving! Put on your gardening clogs (or hiking boots, or dancing shoes...), get out there, and do it!
STEP 5 -- Reflect and acknowledge. After you return from your YOU time, perhaps as you close your eyes and nestle in to sleep that night, allow the memories of it to come rushing back. What were the smells in the air, the sensations on your skin, the sights, the sounds, the feelings, the energy? Reflect on the details of your experience and give yourself some much-deserved credit for taking the time to recharge!
I'd love to hear how this goes for you, your experiences, what came easily and what got in the way... Please leave your comments below.
I imagine that a little rejuvenation might feel good to you right about now, too.
So... how can I keep this energetically lifted feeling, yet eliminate the overwhelm, you ask? Just follow these five easy steps and you'll be on your way:
STEP 1 -- Allow yourself to dream. What is it that you absolutely love? What feeds your soul? The fresh scent of earth as it's churned beneath your trowel? The vastness and wonder of a starry night sky or a rugged, isolated beach? The ecstatic bliss of being completely surrounded by and filled with music as you close your eyes and your body moves magically to the beat, the rhythm, the melody...
STEP 2 -- Decide. Now, if you weren't having fun already, really let loose here. What one thing would be most amazing to immerse yourself in right now? That's the one!
STEP 3 -- Schedule some YOU time. No have-to, must-do, gotta get done stuff here. And try and carve out time that will be yours alone. How much time depends on you. Two or three hours would be a really good start, but don't knock yourself if you can dedicate only 15 minutes. Seriously, write it on your calendar or your favorite time management tool. Consider scheduling several shorter "YOU times" if one long one feels daunting. [hint: this is a great place to ask for some help -- help caring for the kids, taking care of Mom, preparing that presentation. Now's a great time to cash in on offers of assistance and to delegate.]
STEP 4 -- Get moving! Put on your gardening clogs (or hiking boots, or dancing shoes...), get out there, and do it!
STEP 5 -- Reflect and acknowledge. After you return from your YOU time, perhaps as you close your eyes and nestle in to sleep that night, allow the memories of it to come rushing back. What were the smells in the air, the sensations on your skin, the sights, the sounds, the feelings, the energy? Reflect on the details of your experience and give yourself some much-deserved credit for taking the time to recharge!
I'd love to hear how this goes for you, your experiences, what came easily and what got in the way... Please leave your comments below.
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